Things in the Hruby household are in full swing right now. We're all doing our assigned duty to prepare for Ava's upcoming birthday party. This particular birthday has had me thinking a lot. For whatever reason, turning six is a huge deal for Ava. She's been walking up to Jeff and me for at least a month now and saying, "You know, I'm 6 years old". We say "no, not yet" she disagrees, etc. She seems to think that we live in one of those societies where turning 6 means you can now be the leader of your own tribe...if there is one of those. Let's just say that if this is that society (God help us), I can predict a couple things:
1. The tribe would consist of Ava, Sophia, several Barbies, some My Little Ponies, and a smattering of Playmobil characters.
2. The tribe would have the shortest history of any across the globe past, present, or future. Here's why:
Ava and Sophia are very much like playing with an older kitten. Very cute and fuzzy, make adorable noises, play play play BITE! And now everyone is bleeding, a slap fight has broken out and the girls are screaming things like "Sophia! You just make me so ANGRY!! I am going to leave this room right now because I feel like screaming at you", or "Ava! You are the meanest girl ever! And you are NOT invited to my party!" Sometimes negotiations break down to hair pulling or colored picture ripping. They really know how to hit where it hurts.
I lost track there. So, Ava has chosen to break out the phrase, "It's MY birthday party". Yeah, neat-o. I have tried to go the ignore it and it'll stop route, but that did nothing. So, this weekend at Target, I laid down the law. I try not to do that, but if you read one of the previous blogs about me and cereal aisle lady, you need no more explanation. I was going to get more cups for Ava's school birthday party. The girls were supposed to stay with Jeff. Ava disagreed and tried to get out of the cart. We said stop...oh, about 36 times...and she didn't. The parental voices got terse and Ava shot back, "It's MY party!!". Ruh-roh. I stomped back over to her and said (please note the quotation marks), "I have had ENOUGH of that! It IS your party, but it is MY MONEY! And if I hear the phrase "it's my party" again, I WILL TAKE IT AWAY!! Now! What color cups do you want!!
I would be remiss not to point out the magical part of watching a child prepare for what is apparently the most important party of their very short life. I watch Ava talk about her party in a presidential inauguration kind of way. "Now, Mama. Did you get the puppy plates?" "Yes" "Did you get the kitty plates?" "Yes" "Were you able to find more gummy flip flops?" "No" "Well, why not?!" Now, this last question is asked in what I have to assume is exactly the same tone as a police officer interrogating someone about why they didn't go back to see if the Bengal Tiger had in fact eaten their friend. How do you answer that? Well, there is only one company that sells the gummy flip-flops and we already ordered from them (missing something in the fine print about how best to hold your own ankles when you bend over). We eventually came to an agreement about the party favors. She would leave the subject alone and I would let her live to see them.
All that said, I do remember the magic of being a kid and having birthday parties. I remember driving to the hotel for my swim party all the while keeping my eyes on the wrapped gifts in the back. I always thought I knew what I was getting, I was never right. I still remember the commercials for what was "Kirkwood Inn" and I remember thinking, "the kids in that commercial are the luckiest kids ever". Everything was all chlorine scented and you were guaranteed sausage pizza and orange pop. At the end of the day, your eyes burned from the prolonged exposure to chlorine they warned you about, there was water in your ears, and you felt like you were still swimming. It was the perfect kind of exhausted. Even better if you were the birthday boy or girl.
Ava turns 6 in 13 days. I can't believe it. Sometimes she seems so much older than 6, sometimes she seems younger. When she points something out with her hand next to mine, I can't believe how little time she has actually been on this earth. Just tiny. Inside Ava, there is the kind of spirit that will change this world. She is stronger and braver than I ever was, and so, so smart. She has this depth of feeling and emotion that seems endless. Sometimes I forget about the parts of her heart that are just like the parts of mine when I was a little girl. We've never gone to bed without talking things out and making it better. And for as crappy as I feel when I don't hear her out, I so love that she will still sit in my lap and let me hold her while she gives me another chance to LISTEN to her.
On May 29th, at 9:50AM Ava will officially be six. And I will officially be six years into the most important life lesson I've ever been part of.
Thank you God for my Ava Lili, thank you Buddha for helping me see the beauty in every single thing she touches (even if sometimes it's delayed), and thank you to all of you who have loved her and treated her like one of your own. Someday she'll get it too.
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