Bliss

I am vacationing in a corona commercial. I’m not referring to the alcohol, because while there is that and plenty of people are drinking plenty of alcohol, that is not the cornerstone of our vacation. I will admit straight up that I was concerned what kind of vacation could be had in Mexico. Now, that is due purely to a cultural, geographical ignorance on my part. I haven’t heard a lot of great things about Mexico in the news lately, though, CNN is hardly the place to broadcast news they can’t sensationalize. Mexico is beautiful. Our resort upgraded us from the most basic room to their most expensive, decked out, ammenities you can’t even imagine Emerald Room. We are ocean front. We have our own patio and our own private beach. The sand is like walking on powder. The weather is hot and sunny, but the wind is comforting. And the ocean never ceases to amaze me. It makes your brain think in ways it hasn’t been trained to do. I’m sure there are people here who think I am a total nerd because I can’t take two steps without dropping to my knees and checking out a shell. But, here’s the kicker, I don’t care. There are so many people walking around here totally oblivious to the natural beauty. I can’t imagine that. I have to wonder how many of the shells and rocks that the ocean shuttles onto the beach are older than me. The waves wash the sand right out from under your feet, and just as you feel you are going to get pulled out with that sand, the next wave comes in and steadies you. There is most certainly something hypnotic about it. Right now, I’m watching the ocean and pondering all kinds of things.

But here is something pretty great I learned about myself, the closer I get to the equator, the less anorexic I get. Jeff wants to move here. It is like living life through someone else’s mind. I’m eating what I want and I don’t feel even remotely guilty or bad about it. I just keep looking forward to the next meal. Who would have thought that I would go on vacation on a beach and be less self-conscious than when I am in my regular world. Unless you yourself have an eating disorder, you can’t possibly imagine what this feels like. I feel like a human being who does in fact deserve this break. I miss my girls unbelievably and I can’t wait to hug them again. But, that is in one area of my brain. I am so grateful to my amazing, wonderful husband that he pushed for this vacation. I honestly felt during most of the planning that this was more for him. He has always known my soul just a little better than me. And being here, my face hurts from smiling, we get to listen to each other 100% and not worry about the slap fight that’s starting in the playroom.

This place is miraculous.

I hope you are all feeling as zen as I am.

Ang